Ximénez

De esas vidas plenas, que a veces ocurren...

no quiero sino

el cansancio.
no quiero sino romperme la venas
acabarme el aire
llenarme los pulmones de sangre
de bilis
de cansancio
y olvidar
que he estado
que fui
y que
durante tanto
así fuera poco
quise
seguir

trenzas

esta noche... qué buscaba? el olor, la visión... luego llegué... y estabas vos, plena, trigueña, dorada, con tus trenzas... buscaba el olor de hembra... pero vos, no importa que huyera, estabas... no entiendo... el mundo tiene un orden que no corresponde con

shixian

Sharon dice: are you still there, my dear?
Sharon dice: anything happened to you
juancarlos dice: nothing special
juancarlos dice: i'm here
Sharon dice: so why I feel you upset
juancarlos dice: no no
juancarlos dice: not upset
Sharon dice: okay
juancarlos dice: how are you?
Sharon dice: I am just back from a meeting
Sharon dice: difficult to answer your question if it is a question
juancarlos dice: probably... pascale will marry soon.. hotta is a parent... life goes on....
Sharon dice: what is pascale?
juancarlos dice: my french friend... do you remember her?
Sharon dice: of course
Sharon dice: a lovely girl
juancarlos dice: yes
juancarlos dice:
juancarlos dice: i keep her love with me
juancarlos dice: after all these years
Sharon dice: yeah
juancarlos dice: now, what about you?
juancarlos dice: my love, my dear
Sharon dice: wandering around
juancarlos dice: around... what?
juancarlos dice: are u ok?
juancarlos dice: are u happy?
Sharon dice: okay
juancarlos dice: that makes me smile
Sharon dice: but don't know what is happy
Sharon dice: glad, maybe sometimes
juancarlos dice: glad
Sharon dice: joy, fun, sometimes
juancarlos dice: as if
Sharon dice: but happiness is different
juancarlos dice: i know
juancarlos dice: so few times to see your eyes
juancarlos dice: telling me about happiness
juancarlos dice: or the lack of it
Sharon dice: the later one, I suppose
juancarlos dice: words
juancarlos dice: are not
juancarlos dice: enough
Sharon dice: for what?
juancarlos dice: so my arms may
juancarlos dice: embarce you
Sharon dice: through internet, I suppose
juancarlos dice: yeah
juancarlos dice: through this
juancarlos dice: though fingers
Sharon dice: happiness is a kind of nature of a personality
Sharon dice: sometimes I do think so
juancarlos dice: are you happy? how much i wish so!
Sharon dice: peaceful at least
juancarlos dice: i never embraced you
juancarlos dice: never
Sharon dice: calm and worship the calmness
juancarlos dice: ok
Sharon dice: that is the life
juancarlos dice: i'll keep the memory
Sharon dice: we usually have to
juancarlos dice: i'll keep the future
Sharon dice: a lot of things is out of our willing
Sharon dice: so, I will, means not very much
Sharon dice: sorry to be so harsh
juancarlos dice: it is ok
Sharon dice: but actually I prefer my life to be as simple as possible
juancarlos dice: i love you to be like that
Sharon dice: since I find out I am good at dealing with complicated emotions
Sharon dice: too serious probably
Sharon dice: always ask why and try to know the reason behind
Sharon dice: it make life a bit burdensome
Sharon dice: so, I do not like such kind of burden
juancarlos dice: it is like a confusion... you know... we have different winds...
Sharon dice: to be a bit superficial probably shall be better
juancarlos dice: it is like... nothing real... when you love someone? yeah...
juancarlos dice: but enough
juancarlos dice: to know
juancarlos dice: you're human
Sharon dice: everything will erade away
juancarlos dice: enclosed
juancarlos dice: ah, sharon
juancarlos dice: my life was swept away
Sharon dice: will shade away
juancarlos dice: but still you know me...
Sharon dice: it is true
juancarlos dice: so i still go away... but i keep a little longer
Sharon dice: there is different kind of loves
juancarlos dice: so many kinds
Sharon dice: I feel I love all others generally
juancarlos dice: but i feel as.... if need your words...
Sharon dice: do you know what are you living for?
juancarlos dice: no
juancarlos dice: then.. . i see the night
juancarlos dice: as if calling
Sharon dice: ?
juancarlos dice: sorry
juancarlos dice: nevermind
Sharon dice: I did not understand your "I see the night"
juancarlos dice: i'll go to sleep
Sharon dice: yes,
juancarlos dice: the darkness
Sharon dice: have a good sleep
Sharon dice: that is real life
Sharon dice: until the end of day
juancarlos dice: i hope someday
juancarlos dice: i'll be able
juancarlos dice: to touch
juancarlos dice: you
juancarlos dice: again
juancarlos dice: in happiness
juancarlos dice: and
juancarlos dice: wonder
juancarlos dice: bye
Sharon dice: bye

numb

atravieso liviano los días
sin el equipaje que me ata a mí mismo (no, a ese desconocido que fue mí mismo).
pesado de pretéritos, de esa amenaza permanente que es el presente, de convertirse en pasado.
quiero volver a lugares de donde me he deshabitado. pero puede más el cansancio.
el tedio.
quisiera traicionar mis entrañas.
no puedo.
quisiera cerrar la puerta.
por ahora cierro ventanas.
quienes llaman no me saben, quienes vienen no me hablan. a otro, que les es cómplice, le cuentan o le fornican.
pero bien saben que no hay aquí nada que puedan llevarse.
y así se van, más vacíos, más meláncolicos, algo confundidos o furiosos o pensando ya en otra cosa.
menos mal es así.
maldito sea
el mundo.